Not your fault
by memekmg12
Summary: I need to make a decision, is he trustworthy or not! Come on Hermione you need to hurry up and choose before he has time to get across the street! Well, if it's fight or flight then I choose... flight. Remus ran across the street towards me not even breaking stride when a car nearly hit him. I'm really sorry I know the summary is horrible but hopefully the story is a lot better! ;D
1. Not your fault- story

Disclaimer: Do not own Books or movies (I wish I did though) I do not own the characters either or the song in the next "chapter"

AN: while I do not expect every comment to be rainbows and unicorns ( I wouldn't want them to be) since this is my first story I would like constructive feedback (Ex. You need to work on..., Should include more..., or Needs more pizzazz) just don't include stupid comments (Ex. This story is stupid, I hate that pairing, you ruined that pairing for me, or you write horribly) that don't help me to become a better writer (I already lack enough confidence in that area)Praise always appreciated however.

AN2: The next "chapter" will be the song the title is named after I'm including it in this (kind of, sort of) one-shot because I feel the actual lyrics match the story at least through part of the song.

"Can I trust him" I Whisper Helplessly. I was staring at one Remus Lupin; he was standing just across the street looking kind of lost. I knew that at any moment he could look up and catch me staring, but I'm not sure whether he would recognize me anymore. Truth be-told I don't think I even care anymore. I made my choice years ago. I am not the little girl he once knew.

My life has been harsh, I have seen too many things, and I know too much in order to still be the girl he knew once upon a time. Right at that moment Remus looked up and saw me, for a split second the thought that he couldn't tell who I was crossed my mind, but when the look of recognition crossed his features all hopes of going unnoticed were dashed from consciousness.

_I need to make a decision, is he trustworthy or not! Come on Hermione you need to hurry up and choose before he has time to get across the street! Well, if it's fight or flight then I choose… flight. _Remus ran across the street towards me not even breaking stride when a car nearly hit him. Apparently I forgot to account for his super werewolf speed because as I got ready to run as far away as possible, preferably to a deep dark hole in which I can hide away in, sort of like a Hobbit in a way, I heard his voice and all memories, the good and the bad, flashed through my racing panicky mind.

"Hermione… Is it really you?" He whispered with disbelief and doubt laced within his pained voice. I immediately, for the first time, felt guilty about leaving without telling anyone or at least sending assurances by telling them, via owl of something like that, that I was alive and well. "It's me… I guess" I choked out afraid of what he would say or do next or, worse yet, what **I **will blurt out or do next. Though I wouldn't blame him if he started to yell and scream at me once the shock starts to fade away.

"Why" it was a vague and short statement but I understood what he meant with just that one word. "I had to, Just HAD to! You have to believe me Remus it was killing me to stay there. I couldn't stand that place anymore and I had no clue what-so-ever about what I should do! So, I just followed my instincts and left." I answered as he took in the sight that stood in front of him.

I was no longer Hermione Granger brightest, brightest witch of her age, and bookworm extraordinaire. The one with the bushy hair, hot temper, insatiable thirst for knowledge and poor people skills. The one that ran after her friends at the first sign of danger in order to keep them safe without regard to her own personal well-being . She cheered them up if they were feeling down even if she was upset herself. That Hermione, however, was long gone, and has been for years now ever since she left her heart with the one she loved.

What made it all the more unbelievable was the way she looked and held herself, her hair was sleek and a darker brown than he remembered almost like the color of dark chocolate. She was wearing a flowery red blouse, which seemed to flow smoothly over her body like a waterfall, with a tight pair of skinny jeans that just seemed to grip her assets and a pair of black knee-high boots. She also held herself a bit more like Snape, you know, like she knows she's smarter than you and she's not afraid to show it even though she recognizes that it's not necessary. She, also, didn't have that frightened look, that seemed to always haunt her eyes ad his soul, which meant if she was afraid that if she didn't prove her intelligence to others then nobody would accept her presence in the magical community. Except him, nobody except him and I guess that's how he wormed his way in her heart and held on even as she left losing a part of herself as she did so. And that's why she left, because Hermione Granger loved Remus Lupin and there was nothing she could do about it accept run away from her feeling, which has become a bad habit over time.

"Why was it killing you to stay here? To stay with me? Were we not good enough for the **_great _**Hermione Granger!?" The heartbreak and pain in his voice twisted at her heart, or what was left of it anyways, making her want to cry or laugh or maybe both. "Was I not good enough? Did I do something wrong? Was it my fault?" He whimpered miserably gripping her arm like it was his life line. He didn't realize how close to home he hit because it was mostly her fault for giving her heart away to a man who she knows would never, ethically, allow himself to accept it.

"No... It's not your fault… it's mine." Tears welled up in my eyes as the anger built up in my chest. He would make excuses as to why they couldn't be together such as I'm too old for you, I'm dangerous, it could be considered bestiality, I could accidentally tear you apart during sexual intercourse, and I'm poor even though I inherited some money from Sirius, blah blah blah, etc. etc. This was all I could think as I stormed off and away leaving Remus in the dust, staring after me as if he couldn't believe that I actually did that. I didn't make excuses I took action and left, possibly for good this time, leaving behind my old to start anew.

~THE END (or is it...)~

AN3: Well that's my first story EVER besides ones required by school so hopefully I didn't do too badly :D

AN4(sorry for so many AN's): If anyone would like for me to continue this idea just let me know and I might because I (personally) like this story (duh, considering I wrote it) and wouldn't mind continuing on with this idea. Anyways thanks for even reading it and let me know if I need to adjust the rating.


	2. Not your fault- song

Disclaimer: This is not MY song (I am not that creative)

AN: Some or at least part of the lyrics (I feel) match up to the story

**Not Your Fault- Awolnation** (they are really good! :D)

She was built with a brain  
>and some swagger.<br>A little scream, little cry,  
>little laughter.<br>She's a ten,  
>I'm a joke in my own mind.<br>But she still loves to dance  
>with my punch lines.<br>This love found us  
>now I see it.<br>This love up down.  
>Please believe.<br>Baby, when I'm yellin' at you,  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah  
>and<br>Baby cuz I'm crazy from you,  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah  
>Maybe I'm a little confused,<br>It's not your fault  
>It's not your fault, yeah<br>and  
>Baby, it's a wonderful news.<br>It's not your fault  
>It's not your fault, yeah<br>Oh, it's not that you should care.  
>I just wanted you to know.<br>I'm at fight with myself  
>till I'm bleeding.<br>Just a taste of your skin  
>starts to heal me.<br>Anyone from my past  
>get your ammo.<br>Find my sun in the dark side  
>of my shadow.<br>This love found us  
>now I see it.<br>This love up down.  
>Please believe.<br>Baby, when I'm yellin' at you,  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah  
>and<br>Baby cuz I'm crazy from you,  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah  
>Maybe I'm a little confused,<br>It's not your fault  
>It's not your fault, yeah<br>and  
>Baby, it's a wonderful news.<br>It's not your fault  
>It's not your fault, yeah<br>Oh, it's not that you should care.  
>I just wanted you to know.<br>Hey, hey  
>na na na na<br>Hey, hey  
>na na na na<br>Hey, hey  
>na na na na<br>Hey, hey  
>na na na na<br>na na na na  
>na na na na<br>Oh, it's not that you should care.  
>I just wanted you<br>Oh, it's not that you should care.  
>I just wanted you to know.<br>Oh oh oh  
>Baby, when I'm yellin' at you,<br>It's not your fault  
>It's not your fault, yeah<br>and  
>Baby cuz I'm crazy for you,<br>It's not your fault  
>It's not your fault, yeah<br>Maybe I'm a little confused,  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah  
>and<br>Baby, it's a wonderful news.  
>It's not your fault<br>It's not your fault, yeah  
>Oh, it's not that you should care.<br>I just wanted you to know.

Read more: Awolnation - Not Your Fault Lyrics | MetroLyrics


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